We’ve all been there.

A friend, colleague, or significant other feels stuck—and they come to you for help.

What’s your first move, give them advice or ask a question? How come?

Consider this:

“There is only one way to get anybody to do anything. And that is by making them want to do it.” —Dale Carnegie

And to make them want to do it, they often must come to the solution themselves.

All achieved through asking powerful questions.

SUPERHUMAN SCORING

In every edition of System Sunday, I assess the featured system across three superhuman dimensions: impact, setup, and maintenance.

Unlike your typical review, I focus on factors that influence personal growth. Get to know the evaluation system.

Impact (9.5/10)

A few months ago, I left my management consulting job at Ernst & Young (to start a private coaching practice and pursue my passion for writing).

I learned a lot at the firm, but the thing that stuck with me the most?

EY’s creed: “The better the question, the better the answer.”

Setup (7.5/10)

Make asking questions your default (rather than immediately providing advice).

If someone asks directly for your opinion, you can always give it.

Here are 5 of my favorite questions:

1. “How can you achieve your 10-year plan in the next 6 months?”

Ask this when:

• They're thinking too small
• You want to generate bigger and bolder ideas

Break through outdated paradigms.

(Source: Peter Thiel)

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2. The Feynman Technique

“How would you teach it to a child?”

Ask this when:

• They're learning something new
• The subject is complex
• They're formulating “how-to” instructions

Encourage them to return to learning, fill in knowledge gaps, and simplify further.

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3. The 5 Whys Method

“Why?” (Repeat 3-5 times)

Ask this when:

• You want to uncover root causes, not proximate

Proximate = what immediately caused something to happen.

Root = the real reason something happened

Be hard on the problem, soft on the person.

(Source: Sakichi Toyoda)

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4. Amazon's Working Backward Method

“What would a press release for this product say?”

Ask this when:

• They have a new product idea

Follow-up actions:

• Work backward from the customer POV
• Draft an FAQ + press release BEFORE building the product

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5. The Joe Rogan Razor

“What would you do right now if a documentary crew were following you around?”

Ask this when:

• Clarifying their purpose
• There's an ethical decision

Rogan says it’s the best life advice he's ever received:

Live your life like you're the hero in the movie.

Want the full list of my 12 favorite questions? Check out this popular LinkedIn post.

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Maintenance (7.0/10)

Keep a list of your favorite questions handy (I use Evernote as it syncs across mobile and desktop).

Practice in everyday moments with friends and family.

That way, asking good questions will come more naturally in work settings.

BRINGING IT HOME

One final thing: Be your own best coach.

Ask yourself these questions, too.

You'll be dangerous.

All systems go,

P.S. Welcome to the 4,726 subscribers who joined us since last week! We are now 175,000+ strong. Come say hi on Instagram, LinkedIn, or Twitter 👋

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